2011 was the most challenging year I’ve had to deal with, mentally, physically and emotionally. Quite frankly, I couldn’t wait to see the back of it.

My baby sister got married Late December. This bought out the competitive side to the wedding party…….wow…….it was tense. We all decided to do our own version of the biggest looser…..yes we did. With, Contestant number one wanting to walk down the aisle looking 15 years younger. Contestant number two putting us through a brutal exercise routine running up Luton’s steepest hill then, risking our lives running back down….this contestant got out the rat race by purposely getting a bun in the oven. Contestant number three placed a bet that she could make her signature hips vanish….cough cough, not mentioning any names.

The bride to be’s home became a green smoothie heaven…. Or hell for some. Spinach, banana and orange juice…apple juice if you wanted a treat …true story. At this point for me,starving myself started to look like an attractive option.

With the wedding approaching fast I felt i had done everything I could to shift the unwanted pounds. Running, gym, falling in love, breaking up, the uncomfortable cycling machine,green smoothies, walking, weight watchers, team exercise, emails full of encouragement and healthy option recipes, steam spa’s whilst wrapped in cling film….what?……nobody else tried that?! Moving on swiftly, I am now fully qualified to give sound advice on weight loss.

Did it do the trick? Hell no! Any weight shifted ended up due to stress and bad nerves so we all threw in the towel.  Loosing stones was the bride and grooms problem! I only had to worry about shedding pounds. So I decided to explore alternative methods of weight loss. I would walk down that aisle looking like a size zero by hook or crook…so here’s the crook………

I have been a nip and tuck snob for a very long time. I’m not talking about your under the knife nip and tuck…..I’m talking girdles, corsets, control underpants, cycling pants, push up bra’s, breast reduction bra’s, waist nippers, tummy tuckers, bum padded knickers…..not forgetting the death by underwear body magic!! Only for the brave i tell ya.

Im talking instant body fixers! Luring me with promises of an hour glass figure. Leaving me in a cloud of heavenly whispers…..support, boost, contours, flattens……..sweet words.
The pain and suffering of a day in a woman’s body! Damn it! i’ll take the whole lot in the size smaller than i am…..yes i said it……it gives extra cinch!

I’m a 34 year old figure cheat virgin who recently succumbed to my body calling out for a little helping hand. Seeing as me and the gym no longer speak the same language I have recently made purchases, worn the purchases, nearly cut my self out of the purchases, can’t live without my purchases and often times have trouble breathing in my purchases. I have however practiced passing out gracefully, worst case scenario

Why has it taken me so long to come on board… Well I’ve been told I over analyze everything…. Fact..
My first thought about squeezing into a pair of tummy tuckers was…. How would this affect my sex life?….. Am I the only one that thought of those intimate details? How a man would feel after everything was released to it’s original position? How romantic was,your partner fighting to take off your latex underwear in the heat of passion? Can you really be spontaneous when you’re being hoisted up by these miracle shape fixers?? All this secret support that aren’t so secret!!! Is it only me that thinks of these things?

Well, after years of thinking it’s not worth it, I’ve given up! Desperate times have called for desperate measures! I’m now obsessed and want to know what the next piece of underwear can do for me?! It surely  can’t just be underwear with no perks…..that’s so 80′s.
The right underwear is very key to how your clothes look on the outside. Its not just about appearing to look more shapely or thinner, it’s about smoothing out the appearance of your figure giving a tidy finish. Nobody likes the look of over spill, back fat, bat wings, love handles, sagging boobs etc.

So rather than spend another year trying out the second most dangerous fad diet in Britain…….drunkorexia.
My new year resolution is to fake fabulous. I figure, life is too short to fight with mother nature. So I’m taking matters into my own hands by enhancing what mother nature forgot.

If you’re having sleepless nights cause you aren’t got it……fake it! Whatever you do, stay safe and do let someone in on your little secret. The chances of passing out are on a shocking rise lol.

PS…….Don’t worry about the effects on the sex life and romantic moments. These products are usually modeled on people that don’t need them! People like me have to find out the expensive way whether the effects are for real or not.

We are living in a society of false advertisement! What’s wrong with one more white lie……

Here’s to a faking fabulous 2012
In Love, Sisterhood And Fashion

Cocobeanx

I thought i would share my love for Nubian fabrics and the knowledge i have come across whilst researching what i do best……..picking FABULOUS fabric darling!

I pride myself in having the ability to choose fabric that makes a white woman want one of those! I specialise in sourcing the most beautiful vibrant wearable in your face and subtle fabrics for both the feisty and the faint hearted fashionistas. Lets be honest…….even Africans are scared of African fabric….i tell you no lie.

Being African myself…preferably Nubian, i know how in your face ethnic print can be. With what is deemed as scary musks adorning our fabrics, mobile phones…….ice cream cones, hens, umbrellas even president Obama, name it and I’ve probably seen it. Bearing this in mind i can sympathise with individuals who feel this is just a tad bit off the fashion radar.

This is where the knowledge comes in. Having knowledge of the fabric you drape yourself in gives you the power of a walking museum. Our fabric tells story’s both old and current like the hieroglyphics on the Egyptian temples. It gives you the essence of time, place, strife and victory. African fabric and ethnic inspired fabric are both an expression of these story’s.

As you may have noticed i have differentiated African fabric and ethnic inspired fabric/print. One is made in Africa, the other gets its design inspiration from the motherland. African original fabric can be expensive because of the process that goes behind the making of the textile. Inspired fabric is cheaper cause it can be printed and mass produced outside of Africa.

The following is an introduction to authentic African textiles not cheap prints or poor imitations. As written by Victoria Saho © Textiles and Fabric of Africa, 2009.

Textiles are often enhanced through hand-stamping, stenciling, dyeing, painting, or embroidery. Sometimes soil is used to make paint, and dyes can originate from herbs, leaves, bark, nuts, fruits, vegetables, and grasses; these are mixed with water or other chemicals such as zinc, sulfur, or iron to obtain the desired thickness and hue. Colors hold different cultural meanings based on village or family affiliations. In some parts of Nigeria, red is a threatening color worn by chiefs to protect them from evil, but it is a sign of accomplishment in other areas, while red is used for mourning robes by the Akan in Ghana and for burial cloths in Madagascar.

Traditionally, many African textiles were not cut or sewn into garments, they worn draped and tied to suit various occasions. But with the interest in textiles in the western world, textiles and handmade fabrics are being cut to make contemporary clothing and home furnishings. When authentic African textiles are fragile or rare it is recommend that they should be professionally mounted or framed for use as wall hangings.

Textiles are often enhanced through hand-stamping, stenciling, dyeing, painting, or embroidery. Sometimes soil is used to make paint, and dyes can originate from herbs, leaves, bark, nuts, fruits, vegetables, and grasses; these are mixed with water or other chemicals such as zinc, sulfur, or iron to obtain the desired thickness and hue. Colors hold different cultural meanings based on village or family affiliations. In some parts of Nigeria, red is a threatening color worn by chiefs to protect them from evil, but it is a sign of accomplishment in other areas, while red is used for mourning robes by the Akan in Ghana and for burial cloths in Madagascar.
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Asoke cloth is very sturdy and practical. The Yoruba in Nigeria reserved this cloth for funerals, religious rituals, and other formal occasions. This cloth is woven in 4-inch wide strips that vary in length. Some older Asoke cloths are characterized by their openwork or holes. It is known for supplementary inlays, which are generally made of rayon threads on a background of silk cotton.

Textile with embroidery displays beautiful artwork and can be found throughout Africa. Usually, patterns are drawn onto the fabric and then stitched by hand or by machine in a complementary color of thread.

Adinkra cloth is made by embroidering wide panels of dyed cotton and stamping them with carved calabash symbols. Adinkra patterns are numerous, ranging from crescents to abstracts forms; each of the symbols carries it own significance and represents events of daily life activities. Adinkra means “farewell” and was used for funerals and to bid a formal farewell to guests. Dark colors, like brick red, brown, or black, were associated with death while white, yellow, and light blue were worn for festive occasions. The cloth is still produced in Ghana today.

Adire cloth comes from Nigeria. There are two types of Adire. One is made by tie dying or by stitching a design with raffia. The second method is painted freehand or stenciled using a starchy paste made from cassava or yams. Both styles of Adire can be found today.

Batik cloth includes patterns by applying melted wax on the fabric. A design is drawn onto the fabric. To produce a multicolor effect, colors are applied one top of the other, beginning with the lightest color. For instance, a cloth is dyed yellow, and then melted wax is applied to areas that are yellow. The cloth is dried after each stage of the dyeing process, and then the wax is removed by scraping or boiling it off the cloth.

Ewe cloth is similar to the Asantes’ kente cloth. This cloth is named after the Ewe people who originated from the southeastern region of Ghana. There are two types of Ewe cloth. Wealthy people wear a type of Ewe cloth that is elaborately decorated. It’s made of silk, rayon, or cotton, and typically contains inlays of symbols representing knowledge, ethnics, and morals as applied in one’s daily life. The other type is made from simple cotton fibers and display modest patterns. It also contains smaller and simpler versions of the more elaborate designs, but they always have a beauty of their own.

Khasa consists of heavy woolen striped blankets that are woven by the Fulani of Mali. The textile is typically 6 to 8 feet long and woven in 8-inch wide strips. Although the traditional blanket is white, it is also common to have yellow, black, or red strips. Khasa is usually ordered for the cold season.

Kente cloth originated from the Fante people of Ghana, who sold this fabric in baskets. The Fante word for basket is “kenten”. Authentic Kente cloth is typically woven in 4-inch wide strips. Kente patterns have religious, political, and even financial significance. Today, there’s a pattern to indicate the importance of almost any special occasion, and colors are chosen to reflect customs and beliefs. Red represents death or bloodshed, and is often worn during political rallies; green stands for fertility and vitality, and is worn by girls during puberty rites; white means purity or victory; yellow represents glory and maturity and is worn by chiefs; gold is for continuous life, is also worn by chiefs; blue represents love and is often worn by the queen mother; and black meaning aging and maturity and used to signify spirituality. Because of its vibrant beauty and regal legacy as a cloth fit for kings and queens, authentic Kente remains one of the most popular fabrics on the market today.

Korhogo cloth is made by the Senufo people of the Ivory Coast. Approximately 5-inch strips are hand-woven. Mud is painted on the cloth to create patterns of animals, men in ceremonial dress, buildings, or geometric designs. The soil used to make this mud is usually black, brown, or rust and is collected throughout West Africa. This textile, which comes in various lengths and widths, is used for clothing as well as for pillows, wall hangings, and folding screens.

Kuba cloth originated from the Democratic Republic of Congo (also known as Zaire). This textile is tightly woven using strands from raffia palm leaves. Raffia strands are also interwoven between the warp and weft to create intricate geometric patterns. Kuba cloth comes in two styles. One has a rich and velvety pile; the other has a flat weave will little or no pile. To create Kuba cloth, vegetable dyes are used on raffia threads that are then embroidered onto finished cloth to create patterns such as rectangles, lines, creative curvatures, and circles. Kuba cloth is used for ceremonial skirts, wall hangings, or mats for sitting and sleeping.

Manjaka cloth is woven in 7-inch wide strips that are sewn together; this textile is distinguished by its intricate geometric patterns. Manjaka originated from Guinea-Bissau and has complex designs. For example, if a section of Manjaka cloth has triangles, the background area will feature a different pattern.

Mud cloth originated from Mali and once worn by hunters. Mud cloth is made from narrow strips of hand-spun and hand-woven cotton, which are sewn together in various widths and lengths. The cloth is first dyed with a yellow solution extracted from the bark of the M’Peku tree and the leaves and stems of the Wolo tree; the solution acts as a fixative. Then, using carved bamboo or wooden sticks, symbolic designs are applied in mud that has been collected from riverbanks and allowed to ferment over time. After the mud is applied to the cloth, it is dried in the sun. The process is repeated several times to obtain a rich color that is deeply imbued in the cloth. When it reaches the desired hue, the cloth is washed with a caustic solution to remove debris and to brighten the background. Today, mud cloth comes in background shades of white, yellow, purple, beige, rich brown, and rust.

African Brocade fabric is made from 100% cotton. Unique designs are intricately woven into shiny and starchy fabric. This cloth is also called Basin fabric. Brocade or Basin fabric is very popular in West Africa.

African Tie Dye Fabric is popular in Africa. A common method of tie dyeing is the formation of patterns of large and small circles in various combinations. This is found particularly among people from Senegal, Gambia, and the Yoruba of Nigeria. There are several techniques used for resist-dyeing. For instance, a cloth is tied or stitched tightly so that the tying or stitching prevents the dye from penetrating the fabric, and sometimes-starchy substance is applied to the textile. This will resist the dye giving pale areas on a dark background when it’s washed at the end of the dyeing process. Another method of tie dyeing consists of folding a strip of cloth into several narrow pleats and binding them together. The folds and the binding resist the dye to produce a cross-hatched effect. A very popular tie-dyeing technique in Nigeria is to paint freehand with starch before dyeing in indigo in order to resist the dye. These are only a few examples of tie-dyeing methods used in Africa today.

African Print fabrics are reproductions and machine made. This fabric can endure heavy wear and tear.

Hope you enjoyed my findings as much as i did. Its not just any odd fabric, its a highly skilled piece of art

Each one teach one
Cocobeanuk

Yesterday i cried,

i cried at the crimes being committed against fashion. What has happened to the guide lines that have been set by hundreds of fashionista’s that paved the way for us, broken codes of conduct and lack of respect for the rules of the fashion bible.

I cried for a failing nation whose ignorance has overlooked the numerous avenues of communication used to educate the masses on wardrobe do’s and don’ts.

I cried for the lack of self love that has driven woman to spend their last sheckles on tragic fashion choices that will only ever look good on a sample size model and the window mannequin advertising it.

Most of all I bawled for myself because I committed my first crime at 16 with my very first click suit and since then my wardrobe has continued to house hidden criminal acts.
Now don’t get me wrong, I am a believer of fashion being an expression of individuality and personality however, is style and swagga something you are born with or something you can be taught?

Are you guilty of the first rule of the fashion bible which is not to purchase any of the outfits seen in the display window……….yes……that also includes when it looks pleasing to the eye . Making this tragic mistake can take you from hero to zero costing you your swagga licence. All professional fashionistas worldwide know that, such a purchase indicates lack of knowledge in interpreting individual swaga with personality and flair. Basically speaking….. It’s a cop out.

Lets take a look at some of the top commandments being abused…….

Wearing cropped trousers when 5 feet 4 or under is a no, no. Petite woman get this wrong by purchasing regular fit cropped trousers. This mistake ends up looking like you are wearing trousers that are too short or shorts that are too long. If however you insist on having a pair in your wardrobe, you need to go for a pair designed for a petite woman.

Good old hareem pants……..what can i say? A misunderstand style that has possibly overstayed its welcome. Women have turned this into a wardrobe staple…..a must have essential……wrong, wrong , wrong! Now, i committed that crime not once, not twice but three times!!! I felt it was great for the curvy figure and the answer to all my prayers……wrong and guilty on all accounts. You see, harem pants look good only with a fitted racer back vest, nothing more. Now, if you cringe at the thought of wearing a vest and being bare armed…..then its time to give up that ghost. Aside from looking like you have a nappy on, harems are unforgiving to the fuller figured woman.

Big breasts and polo necks are my biggest nightmare. Bad weather is no excuse for bad fashion. Big chested women should avoid polo necks like the plague.

Strips can elongate you or widen you. Choose the right stripes for your shape, vertical for size zero not an inch above, horizontal for the curvy. Please don’t get over excited with strips by pairing them with other strips! Wear with matt block colours for the perfect balance.

Animal prints…….wow and double wow…… can anyone get it right? With the risk of looking like an excapy out of the wilderness. How can you own this print?

I have come to the conclusion that only tall slender women can carry this print off. A lycra free, knee length, tailored dress, minimal accessories on a tall Amazonian goddess maybe the only way forward….a tall order, literally. Not all clothing looks good in animal print and this trend has a tendency to look really cheap. If you are not sure about your Amazonian status….avoid at all cost.

Wrong underwear, doesn’t matter what you wear, if the underwear is wrong the clothing looks badly made. Badly fitting bras are the culprit of the four boob look, definitely not the look we are going for. Investing in the right underwear will take you from drab to glam before you even put your clothes on.

Fringing, must we really do fringing this season? I am over it before its even kicked off! It’s a close cousin to tassels and a nightmare to carry off. I’m not going to hate on the sisters that rock this look. Worn Subtly, classy and kept very simple can work. Fringing can not compete with other items otherwise you end up looking like you stepped straight out of a western.

Skinny jeans with muffin tops………..come on…….you know we have to go there. If it doesn’t fit, give it to a loved one. Set it free, you will feel a lot better for it. It is crucial to know yourself in fashion. Know what flatters your frame, shapes, lengths, colours, styles, cut and fabric.

The sizes that are in your general stores are based on a measurement of 100 people and then averaged out. Two people can both be a size 14 but clothes will fit them differently due to fat distribution, height difference, bone structure etc. As you can see, this is why people that can afford it, invest in tailored clothing which only deals with the dynamics of your personal shape.

Remember, just because it’s in fashion doesn’t mean it’s been designed with you in mind. Choose your clothing wisely because if you look good, you feel good. Don’t allow your love for trends to become your fashion nightmare.

Good luck on seeking the good and eliminating the bad and the ugly.

It has taken me 33 years to see the light; i am now a born again expert on me and have a new respect for the dos and don’ts of the fashion bible.

You are what you wear.

Take control of your wardrobe and don’t become a slave to unflattering trends.

In love, sisterhood and fashion

For a girl like me, head wraps have always been an essential must have accessory.Something you had in multiples.

Growing up as a teenager, you didn’t want to be the one being called to get mums ichitambala which in Zambia means her headscarf. This triangular piece of cloth was used for functional purposes. IE: protecting a fresh do from daily activity, preserving the new do, bad weather conditions and to keep out the smell of cooking. Those where the reasons why each Nubian child owned a ichitambala in their home. You grew up seeing, your mother wear it casually within the home, so it was never looked upon as a fashionable accessory.

When i dig deep into my past i remember seeing head wraps at funerals and on woman’s heads being used as padding to make it easier to carry heavy items on top of the head,

I remember feeling embarrassed getting caught in an early morning visit wearing a headscarf, thinking it made me look too African. Those feelings were shared by many young Nubian women but never spoken about or aired out. This went hand in hand with wearing corn rows or braids, it was just verging on too black.

I remember having a braided do, sitting on the bus…..thinking no one was around and done the original white girl flick of the hair. The most embarrassing moment in my life as there was someone sitting behind me. I spent the rest of that journey cringing in my seat and wishing the floor would open up and swallow me whole.

You see the problem that black girls shared but never admitted was the dream of having hair that was long enough to go into a swinging pony tail and a flickable fringe……..well, we pressed and blow dried our hair to an inch of its life to get as close to that dream as possible. Every inch counted…….with the help of, do grow, gel, hot combs, perm kits, ring combs and extension’s, we never once thought this treatment was the product of the lack of growth to our hair.

That embarrassing day was when a shift started to happen in me. Being shamefully caught trying to be a white girl bought about a fear of fringes or any style that seemed abnormally long….i never wanted to risk the need to push, flick or sweep hair out of my face again.

When i was 18 i got with the father of my children, my childhood crush and close friend. With that union came an introduction to seek and embrace knowledge of self, he shared precious tools with me which encouraged me to stop in my tracks, look back and reflect. That year i cut my perm off and lived breathed, ate and embraced Africa. I took in the snigger’s of old friends who felt i was taking a step back in time as my cornrows were reminiscent of our childhood, a time your mum done your hair….. when a lick of dax and a blow dry was as close as you got to a perm kit. They no longer understood me.

Now, head wrapping happened by accident for me. Due to a bad hair day i decided i would put on a head wrap until i had the time to fight with the powers of my 9 ether kingly hair. I put on a slick of gloss matched the wrap to my outfit, smiled and told myself…not bad…..not bad at all.

I walked down Harlesden high street giving it my, and what ? mother earth attitude and sway. i never once imagined how a headscarf could draw so much attention. Especially from men. I had rude boys calling me African princess instead of the usual wha gwan sweetness, i had rasta men greeting me with the highest respect thinking i was one of them…….i had just discovered my mojo baby.

Let me share a bit of mystery with you (my story). Nubian women wore headwraps leaving the forehead exposed partially because it made the facial features appear striking, so anyone that wished to look upon an African woman would look up at her face, as opposed to looking down at her body. Its different styles, colours and fabric indicated a persons social status. It was regal, sophisticated and mysterious.

In fact, the schools of etiquette use the method of placing a book on top of the head to teach young ladies how to walk and sit with correct posture with their back straight and neck elongated..This comes from watching African women walking with heavy goods sitting on headwraps on top of their head which has always kept their posture and appearance regal.

For some other cultures head wraps can reveal spiritual choices and conceal hair loss through illnesses or conditions.

With headwraps going global, they are no longer an exclusive tradition to women of African decent. An adornment that is now an alternative to hats and wigs turbans are now the hottest trend.

As they filter in and out of fashion i say, to hell with your trends. My ichitambala has always been the in thing. I continue preserving my royal heritage with a collection that would turn my mum green with envy. As the West Africans say an attire is not complete until topped with a head scarf.

Watch this space for Cocobeans head-wrap videos soon coming to a computer near you.

Reflecting on a moment in fashion with cocobeanuk.

This summer I gained some weight………okay, okay…..I gained a lot of weight. Yes, that moment of truth that every woman dreads. This has grieved me greatly, because this time last year I felt GREAT about myself. I was actively exercising, doing a boxing and kickboxing class three times a week. I had kicked my first love affair with Mr Fizz, Coke, Lucozade – anything that sparkled. I even left my bit on the side, Galaxy chocolate…….oh yes, I did. I discovered muscles I never knew existed in my body. Sometimes my work out left me crawling out of my bed in agony……but it felt FANTASTIC! But…….something happened between then and now.

Imagine this: my business partner, the kickboxing champion, just happened to be my trainer!!! So my weight gain was under the scrutiny of my personal trainer. What a pisser I hear you say. When Mr Lucozade came back on the scene, The People’s Champion saw the evidence in my recycling bin. I could no longer gauge what the meeting would be about………business or gym membership? Couldn’t a girl put on weight in private?

At this point I fell out of love with my wardrobe, began to hate everything that reminded me of my previous glory. I decided it was time to put the skinny day clothing away and bring out the big boys: kaftan’s and maxi dresses! YES! Every girl’s best friend. Clothes that didn’t discriminate against my new frame and loved me right back. Now we get to the happy ending…..oh yes, there is always a light at the end of the tunnel in fashion. I fell in love again! A summer fling with accessories.

Let me tell you about Mr Accessories. He comes in different shapes, sizes, colours and components but never discriminates against your size. No fighting with zips, no suffocating girdles, no help from the unfortunate soul that has to tell you the outfit you are bursting out of just isn’t working. No embarrassing moments, no changing room queues – just the transformation of a simple outfit into an exsquisite piece.

My summer love affair with accessories began. With only two main shapes left in my wardrobe I have to be a bit more creative about everything else I wear. From jewelled sandals, chunky jewellery, jewelled hair accessories to funky hairstyles. My passion for fashion has been restored, plus a small hole in my purse; a small price to pay for my happiness.

I am in love with my new purchases and just thought I’d share a moment in my life with you. Accessories can lift or tone down an outfit. However, be aware that it can also make or break your outfit. So whilst I work up a sweat again at the mercy of The People’s Champion and get rid of the uninvited guest on my hips, I leave you my delicious new collection of accessories to lust over.

Sharing a moment in time with Cocobeanuk

Being a fashion designer surely means having your closet on lock down……right? Wrong!

unfortunately i am in this fashion nightmare with all my goddesses. Like a million other woman i have dark secrets lurking in my closet.

The sound of the post man ringing down my door bell with a delivery of newly purchased goods has me falling out of my bed with one eye open, tripping down my stairs with my headscarf covering my eyes, all in a bid not to miss the postman! This is the moment i live for! I am a shopaholic. addicted to the smell. touch and feel of new clothes…….ahhhh.

This addiction has created an array of fantastic single pieces that never go with anything i have in my closet. Items purchased on a slim day, others purchased with a prayer for a slim day, i need a pop of colour in my wardrobe outfits, comfortable pieces bought on a fat day, in between slim and fat day outfits, pricey garments bought at a bargain price, diva ish attires and a whole load of extras waiting to be welcomed home, (still sitting pretty in original packaging).

My closet currently represents someone with split personalities…….thats not the look i am going for.

You see, i suffer from the shame of sporting the same outfit twice…..thats the diva in me. Although the saying is “people are busy worrying about themselves to notice what you’re wearing” i beg to differ….thats still the diva in me.

In the last couple of months i have found that the more my wardrobe has grown, the less i have to wear. Late frustrating mornings trying to find an outfit representing the right mood and season from my over flowing closet with no luck. This is the reason why i have now decided to go for a wardrobe detox……..yes, again! This is going to be a brutal and heart wrenching exercise as i have aquired an emotional attachment to my clothes.

My love for fashion is definately hereidatery and so is keeping secrets in my closet.

I remember as a child my mother had a thing for belts……lots of them! To me they all looked alike and i cant ever remember her wearing them all. I got sent to make these purchases and told to shove the newly bought goods as deep into the closet as i could, so my father wouldnt find them. My baby sister does the same, synonamous for asking the postman to throw her guilty purchases over the garden fence so she never misses her delivery and her husband is none the wiser to her addiction.

My older sister has got an eye of an eagle for beautiful garments that the rest of the world seems to over look. She has used the same line for years…..i dont need any more clothes however, everytime you see her, you ask the question…where did you get that from? So we figure its a bid to try and convince herself out of purchasing her guilty pleasures. Her house is like a vibrant, endless, exotic boutique and a fashion haven for us. It is mandatory to leave with an item of clothing with each visit.

My brother…….a fashion icon i must say so myself. Swagger tight and no shame in his expendature to keep it that way. Has a unique style and a love for all things swagerlicious in life. This addiction keeps him working unsociable hours to maintain his love for fashion.

My baby brother (the dark horse), appears to lead a simple life in fashion but he is a secret shopper of big labels, never seen in shops but like a theif in the night manages to keep a wardrobe of designer gems. So you see, there was never any hope for me.

What is it about fresh gear that makes you feel a whole load of woman, puts a smile on your face and a sway in your hips?

For me, my love for fashion is my way of expressing myself, an extention of my personality, a record of time and place, a journey of growth. Clothes represent so much for me as to why i dwell in the guilty pleasures of mass purchase.

The ethical side of me has however kicked in and its time to clean up, ship out and streamline my closet.

I have opened up my closet and released the secrets of my addiction.

My name is Msongo Mngwali and i am a fashion junkie and have put myself in rehab……which starts right after my last delivery from my VERY catalogue.

What secrets lay in your closet?